This guest blog post was written by Saffron
My experiences with social vary widely—some platforms have been life-changing in the best way, supporting me to grow so much as a person and really develop an identity, and understand myself, while others have left me drained and questioning my self-worth. Over time, I’ve learned to gravitate toward the spaces that are helpful, especially when it comes to engaging with my special interests and finding meaningful communities.
Reddit has probably been the most impactful platform for me, and it’s a form of social media I only found out about a couple of years ago! I love how anonymous it is—you don’t need to curate a perfect profile or worry about how you come across. You can just dive into niche communities full of people who are passionate about the same things. Whether it’s a in-depth discussion on a favorite hobby or being able to share some of my special interest, I’ve found Reddit to be a source of joy and a way to find new friends and learn a lot! It has also proven to be a surprisingly supportive and validating space. I am part of several autism and mental health specific communities, and find both giving advice to others, and sharing my experiences, really therapeutic.
The anonymity of Reddit can make it easier to be honest, to ask questions without fear of judgment, and to simply be yourself without all the noise of appearances.
I do know lots of people who have had negative experiences on Reddit, particularly with so-called internet ‘trolls’ – and I think it’s very important to be aware of the problems that come with giving anonymity to people. It allows them to ‘hide behind the screen’. I am careful with the communities, or ”subreddits’, I choose to post in, and strive to always be kind and helpful to others – as I’d like to be treated.
Facebook, also, surprisingly, has made a bit of a comeback for me in recent years. The groups feature allows me to connect both locally and globally. I’m in several community-based groups that keep me updated on events and resources nearby, and have even at times asked for advice about my hobbies that are closer to home! For example, I like to review new foods, and I can ask people if they know if a local shop has got a new product yet! But, like Reddit, I’ve also reconnected with my interests through specialised Facebook groups—ones for neurodiversity, ARFID, as well as Tamagotchi collecting, and reading! These spaces offer a kind of groundedness that’s hard to find elsewhere, and I think it’s because Facebook is not as popular with a lot of young people, who tend to be more judgemental, and because it isn’t about building a profile and followers and things. It’s all about connection.
On the flip side, platforms like Instagram and TikTok have taken a toll on my mental health. They’re great for creative expression, sure, but I find the constant stream of highly curated lives exhausting. It’s easy to fall into a trap of comparison—everyone looks perfect, happy, successful. It creates a pressure to perform rather than just exist, and that’s something I’ve had to step back from. I use Instagram very very carefully now, mainly to look for crochet patterns and inspiration for crafts, and to message some friends who don’t use other social media. I have been able to form close friendships thanks to social media (be this Instagram, Facebook, Reddit, or other applications), and many of these have been much more accepting of who I am than anyone I have met before. I have friends who are non verbal and over years we have become best friends through online watch-togethers, occasional post/snail mail swaps, messaging, and playing games and quizzes together.
Social media has helped me to understand my autism, grow in confidence as I unmask, accept my difficulties, be proud of my strengths..and just learn so much about all the things I love, thanks to communities relating to autism, mental health, and my interests.
But, if I could change anything about social media, I’d build more intentional spaces—places where authenticity is valued over appearance, where conversations matter more than clicks. My ideal social media space would feel more like Reddit or a close-knit Facebook group: welcoming, honest, interest-focused, and free from performative expectations.
Social media, at its best, connects us. At its worst, it isolates us under the illusion of togetherness. I’m learning to curate my digital life the same way I do my real one—by choosing the spaces that let me be fully, freely myself.
